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What Do I Say?: The Therapist's Guide to Answering Client Questions, by Linda N. Edelstein, Charles A. Waehler
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The must-have guide to honestly and sensitively answering your clients' questions
Written to help therapists view their clients' questions as collaborative elements of clinical work, What Do I Say? explores the questions—some direct, others unspoken—that all therapists, at one time or another, will encounter from clients. Authors and practicing therapists Linda Edelstein and Charles Waehler take a thought-provoking look at how answers to clients' questions shape a therapeutic climate of expression that encourages personal discovery and growth.
Strategically arranged in a question-and-answer format for ease of use, this hands-on guide is conversational in tone and filled with personal examples from experienced therapists on twenty-three hot-button topics, including religion, sex, money, and boundaries. What Do I Say? tackles actual client questions, such as:
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Can you help me? (Chapter 1, The Early Sessions)
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Sorry I am late. Can we have extra time? (Chapter 9, Boundaries)
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I don't believe in all this therapy crap. What do you think about that? (Chapter 3, Therapeutic Process)
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Why is change so hard? (Chapter 4, Expectations About Change)
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Will you attend my graduation/wedding/musical performance/speech/business grand opening? (Chapter 20, Out of the Office)
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Where are you going on vacation? (Chapter 10, Personal Questions)
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I gave your name to a friend . . . Will you see her? (Chapter 9, Boundaries)
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Should I pray about my problems? (Chapter 12, Religion and Spirituality)
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Are you like all those other liberals who believe gay people have equal rights? (Chapter 13, Prejudice)
The power of therapy lies in the freedom it offers clients to discuss anything and everything. It's not surprising then, that clients will surprise therapists with their experiences and sometimes with the questions they ask. What Do I Say? reveals how these questions—no matter how difficult or uncomfortable—can be used to support the therapeutic process rather than derail the therapist–client relationship.
- Sales Rank: #332606 in Books
- Published on: 2011-05-31
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.30" h x 1.00" w x 6.15" l, 1.21 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 384 pages
Review
"What Do I Say? is a useful guide for beginning psychotherapists and, therefore, is appropriate for most graduate courses on psychotherapeutic process. The book is equally useful for any psychotherapy supervisor..." (Psychotherapy, 2012)
Review
"This book is terrific. As a seasoned psychotherapist and instructor, I found it to be an intelligent and sensitive guide that will shepherd therapists through the potential pitfalls of client questions—especially those that snag us at the beginning of our careers. It is a deftly written wellspring of practical advice that will allay the anxieties of students and therapists alike."
—Michael C. LaSala, Ph.D., LCSW, Director of MSW Program, Rutgers, The State University of New Jersey
"On one level, What Do I Say? is a practical "how to" guide offering some excellent suggestions for responding to the many questions that clients can ask. But dig deeper and you'll also find an in-depth exploration of the therapeutic relationship and the ways in which questions from clients are opportunities to explore and to strengthen this relationship."
—Mary Kate Reese, PhD, LPC, NCC, Professor and Associate Chair, Counseling Department Argosy University
"I commend the authors for an excellent contribution to the literature on therapy process and how to navigate the many challenges we face as working clinicians. In our training, we spend so much time on the bigger picture and many times have little opportunity to try our hand at the individual questions that will surely arise in our work with others. What Do I Say? is the perfect remedy, and this is the most practical book I have come across in my training and professional development."
—Raymond L. Sheets, Jr., M.A., 5th Year Ph.D. Student in Counseling Psychology Western Michigan University
From the Author
This was a wonderful book to write. I found myself recalling events from years ago; moments that made a lasting impact on me. Answering questions can be challenging. Early in the writing, Charlie Waehler, my co-author and I decided to invite other clinicians (new and seasoned) to contribute their experiences to the book so we have other voices added to our own. Answering clients' questions is a universal clinical experience but can be rough when you are new. We wrote this book with early career clinicians in mind and tried very hard to combine sophisticated ideas, practical advice, and personal mistakes as well as successes. A young social worker called it, "A supervisor in my backpack." It is certainly a book that would have helped me when I was starting out, filled with equal parts optimism and anxiety. I hope that reading "What Do I Say?" fuels your optimism and quells your anxiety.
Most helpful customer reviews
10 of 10 people found the following review helpful.
Clear, Real, and Empathic
By Vanessa
This book really is fantastic. I picked it up at a store the other day and just had to have it!! It tackles the questions clients ask a therapist all throughout their therapy with you, from the initial phone call and on. The author teaches us what's behind these questions and gives clear, professional, yet warm responses that always put the client first without compromising boundaries or the therapist's personality. I'm very, very impressed and I am thrilled that a book like this is finally on the market. There is another book out there called "What Therapists Say and Why" that's about 95% useless, but "What Do I Say?" is really worth it!!
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
Not Just for Professionals
By Hedda Leonard
Disclosure: I am not a psychologist or therapist. I've never been in a therapeutic relationship, and Linda Edelstein is a longtime personal friend of mine. I've always admired Linda's thoughtfulness, intelligence and creativity and this book brings out those qualities and more.
As a non-professional I quickly realized that if you are considering therapy this book is great preparation! It will answer many of your concerns beforehand. I would also recommend that the spouse/partner of such a professional read this book for a deeper appreciation of your loved one's day and the situations he or she faces but because of confidentiality cannot discuss openly.
I love how the Question and Response sections are laid out. You needn't read the book from cover to cover but you can spend time wherever your interests are aroused. You may even become a better listener by seeing how skillfully Linda responds to her patients' questions while giving them the opportunity to feel, think, and behave in new ways.
If Linda weren't such a dear friend, I would want her to be my therapist!!!
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
what every therapist and therapist-to-be needs on hand
By inkspot
This book is a MUST HAVE for everyone, not only therapists. At a recent party, I passed it around to my friends and family, some of whom are doctors, house painters, carpenters, teachers, architects and lumberjacks. All of them found a section in this book that they could relate to. For example, my cousin was reading what Dr. Edelstein wrote about boundaries and came to understand why her therapist did not attend her family party, even though she had shared so much with her therapist and felt like she was part of the family.
Dr. Edelstein writes with warmth and understanding. The question and response format makes it easy to pick up and read at any time. I am a retired social worker, and I wish Dr. Edelstein would have written this book when I was practicing because it so useful and insightful. It is a "go-to" book...I love it.
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